Chewbakka Jones and the Temple of Doom

July 7, 2017

Chewbakka Jones?

I was browsing yesterday for a book on horses in the Simply Books No 1 emporium. As I did so, my eye was caught by an instruction manual entitled How Not to Write a Novel.

Horse book nicely installed in its gift-wrapped box, I add How Not to Write a Novel to my purchase. It was a sound investment. And, as they say in many a blurb, I read it long into the evening, as the battles of tennis supremacy at Wimbledon pass me unheeded across the room. I tick off various crimes against publication I commit on a regular basis.

Mind reeling from what I had learned, I cross out a load of post-modern film-flam from my uncompleted novel. My previously unnamed narrator gets a memorable name, and  faces more heroic challenges.

The title? One comes to mind. But I fear for legal challenges at a later date. Still, I can at least make it the topic of this week’s blog post …

“Chewbakka Jones and the Temple of Doom”

Sports psychologist Chewbakka Jones is attempting to rescue his academic career by identifying the ingredients of sporting success. His most promising pupil is Tim, a would-be chess-boxing champion.

 His research, which takes place in a sleepy community centre, is disrupted by an invasion of bats, and disturbing ghostly manifestations. The setbacks are connected to a feud between a wealthy businessman and the Dalai Lama, leader of a secret society operating at the Hall.

When Tim and the Dalai Lama are kidnapped, Chewbakka is reluctantly dragged into a perilous rescue attempt.


Klitschko Joshua: The other face of boxing

April 26, 2017
Boxing has been mythologized in countless movies as a mix of human motives and emotions. Exploitation and nobility, courage and crookedness, bravery and betrayal. A contest between good and evil.The match between Vladimir Klitschko and Antony Joshua is being heavily marketed as the battle of the good guys.
A contrast
The fight has attracted more attention than any I can recall in recent years. It has been in complete contrast to the shock-horror trash talk has increasingly been boxing’s marketing plan A.
From Muhammed Ali’s inspired and witty “I am the greatest” creations, the performances have become increasingly crude and violent. There has been a convergence with the pseudo-violence in other martial sports. The pre-fight press-conferences were depressingly characterized by Tyson Fury in his brief spell in the limelight recently before his medical condition and drug dependency were revealed.
Tyson Fury was named by his father after heavyweight champion Mike Tyson famed for his uncontrollable violence in and outside the ring.
The noble art …
In contrast, the Klitschko Joshua rumble has been presented as a battle of heirs to the noble art of boxing. Both were exceptional Olympic champions. Both talk intelligently about boxing.Klitschko, (like Lennox Lewis) is an accomplished chess player.
It is probable that if they wanted to, he and Joshua could compete in the increasingly fashionable sport of chess boxing.

Chess Boxing: No April Fool’s Joke

March 27, 2017

 

Chess Boxing is one of the world’s fastest growing sports, part mind-game, part physical bravery and athleticism. I received notification of an event in London scheduled for  April 1st including a political grudge match between UKIP and Lib Dem contestants. I checked to see it was all an April Fool’s prank

Not at all, I was assured. Get down to London to see it happen.

As Leaders We Deserve has more than its fair share of chess-playing subscribers, I thought the event might be worth a little more publicity.

The Chess Boxing Event

Pity the Fool!
Saturday April 1st

Headline bout: the BREXIT BELT
Featuring UKIP MEP Jonathan Arnott vs LIB DEM activist Toby White

In this headline bout with political clout there is more at stake than just personal honour. Jonathan “The Tactician” Arnott is a strong club level chess player who fits boxing training around his duties annoying fellow MEPs in Brussels. His opponent and veteran of two previous chessboxing bouts, Toby “Slowby” White will be looking for payback after campaigning unsuccessfully for the Remain camp last summer.

The undercard has a strong Finnish theme with appearances from the giant Viking Lars “Lazarus” Bjorknas and his compatriot Ville “Jukola” Makinen from Helsinki. Cameron “The Hurt Locker” Little, the 6ft 7inch London favourite, returns following defeat in December last year. Also  will be hitting the ring, a wily boxer and former junior chess player, Guy Cohen, making his York Hall debut this April.

PLUS: full undercard, live cabaret, DJ, dancing, special guests, announcer extraordinaire Matt Andrews, big screen projection and live commentary so you won’t miss a move!

Venue: York Hall, 5 Old Ford Road London E2 9PJ
Closest tube: Bethnal Green (5mins)
Doors: 7pm. First bout 7.45pm
London Chessboxing has established a loyal cult following over the last six years winning rave reviews from all corners of the media for its totally bonkers mash-up of brains, brawn and pure entertainment. Chessboxing is an unforgettable experience!
“Chessboxing… the muse of our era, crystallizing the symptoms of the system for all to discern.” Karl Ouch, 2015

Meanwhile up north

Your editor is writing a fictional story involving chess boxing, entitled Seconds Out . [Title under protection through ISBN number, 2017].

A well-known regional chess player and amateur boxing enthusiast has offered to audition for the starring role of Tim Hagrid, if film rights are obtained.