Twitter wit and Wisdom May 2023

By popular request, I have collected my favourite tweets from the first two weeks on 2023. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

@mrstephenallen
I have a confession. I didn’t pledge allegiance during the #coronation . But then I click the “I’ve have read all the terms and conditions” box on websites even when I haven’t so it wouldn’t mean much from me.
@pwsimerimiaw
When he [King Charles] entered the Abbey the atmosphere lifted, there were smiles all around. That was noted by people all over the country and he responded warmly to the welcome.
@metpoliceuk
We received intelligence that indicated people were planning to use rape alarms to disrupt the Coronation procession – with concern from the military that this would scare their horses and cause significant risk to the safety of the public and their riders.

@SkyNews
The US has experienced more mass shootings than days so far in 2023, with thousands dead as a result.
@MatthewJshow
Democrat run cities are the cause.
@sibear71
nothing gonna change till they change ‘the right to bear arms’ to ‘the right to arm bears’
@brucepknight
The reaction to the shooting in Texas yesterday told me what I already knew. Elected republicans and their voters will never move on guns. Nothing will happen, unless Dems end the filibuster when they have control and act. And the 2nd Amendment will always limit any real action.

@glowypanda
Yorkshireman takes his cat to the vet. Vet asks him, “is it a tom?” Yorkshireman says “no, in’t basket”

@TollytB
Fun Fact:
Mark Twain died in 1910.
Shania Twain was born in 1965.
Never the Twains shall meet.
🐢💨

@davesumnersmith
In 1959, a coffee maker was an optional extra in VW cars.
The Hertella Auto Kaffeemachine was the first & only known dashboard-mounted coffee maker. Manufactured in 1959 specifically for the Beetle, it came with porcelain cups, which could stick to the machine magnetically.

@Alexverycalm
The unicorns are strong with this one. Brexit stopped Ukraine invasion from succeeding, Jacob Rees-Mogg says
@uroit
Let’s admit it. It’s thanks to Brexit that Moses was able to receive the Ten Commandments and was able to read them.

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